As a child, I was always what some would call “the chubby girl.” Later, as a single mom of two children living in a low-income neighbourhood, I couldn’t always put quality food on the table. A bag of frozen fries was cheaper than fresh fruits and vegetables.

My weight ballooned to 246 pounds. Even walking around the mall was sometimes hard on my back, and I had a hard time shopping for my weight. I tried lots of diets — I would lose some weight only to gain it back a few months later.

Then, in 2018, my doctor suggested I consider bariatric surgery. I got the referral but while waiting for the appointment, I often second-guessed my decision. Being from a Haitian background, I knew many in my community wouldn’t understand why I wanted this surgery. Food is the centre of Caribbean life. Whether celebrating a birth or mourning a death in the family, food is always there. We show love by feeding our relatives and friends. And if someone refuses our offer of food, we might think you’re sick or there’s something wrong.

When I told some family members that I was waiting for bariatric surgery, their first response was, “Why? You’re not fat. You carry your weight very well.”

Some of my friends would comment, “Oh, when you get skinny, you’ll think you’re better than us.” And yet, these were the same friends who would comment, “You’re not ugly. You’re cute for a big girl.” That phrase was said so often to me, and I hated and resented it. And so, I held onto my decision to go through with the surgery. It was the right choice for my health and for my future.

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CBC News
December 9, 2023